The Storm Inside Me

creativity

storm

Hi friends. This week, I’m feeling led to dive into some poetry.

A Storm is brewing,
and it’s me.

The tendrils of my heart,
beg me to see.

My time is not up,
in this malevolent world.

I’ve much to wander,
my passion will not be furled.

Each day is a book,
words to be had.

Weary Traveler

mental health

travel

As I sit here on the floor next to the closest outlet I could find /because we all know outlets are like gold among airports/ I reflect on what it means to be a traveler on a Voyage.

A voyage can be many things. A vacation. A business trip. A road trip. A kayaking trip. Mine happened to be a business trip, and while some might lose sight of the positive aspects of a business trip – this trip has reminded me how blessed I am.

Blessing #1: I have a company willing to invest their time and money in me and furthering my education on the products I deal with as a graphic designer for them. I love my job /not every day is perfect, but for the most part, I’m in love/ and always look for way to improve my view of what I work with.

Open to the Onus

mental health

open

You may be thinking ‘Why would I WANT to be Open to the onus?’ An onus is after all basically a really shitty task, burden, or obligation.

That sounds awful. Right? It is if you choose to let it be awful. And that decision it completely up to you. Believe me, as I walk through my personality and depressive disorders, I’ve chosen to let that onus be really crappy more often than not, because for me, I’ve lived a life full of onuses that I’ve had to deal with while my brain is broken, which means, even though it may seem completely backwards, I’m comfortable in that uncomfortable space.

Today, for me, being open to my onus was choosing to say ‘yes’ to having coffee with a very dear friend of mine. You might say ‘But, that’s not a burden. That’s not an obligation. That’s fun and uplifting!’ On the contrary — to me, and my broke (but mending) brain it’s a scary, socially awkward, worrisome, new, anxiety-filled burden. An onus, if you will.

Transformation Takes Two

mental health

diverse

Transformation

Well, if that isn’t a loaded topic, I don’t know what is.

But, we can do this, together. Here we go.

Transformation can be a difficult thing to imagine, see, and especially do. At this moment in my life, I’ve felt that I’ve been on the verge of transformation for some time. Now, things around me, my relationships, my hobbies, I’ve seen them transform— now, I believe it’s my turn. I want, more than anything, to safely lose the weight I’ve packed on over the years, and keep it off. Before that happens though, I now know that it can’t be just another fad diet or complete restriction—it has to come from within me.

I Am Small, But My God Is Big

mental health

prayer

As I sit here propped up in bed (I should be sleeping, but my nails need to dry some more – that’s my excuse anyway) – I’m listening to a storm roll through. I LOVE STORMS. Yes, I would be a storm chaser if I could switch careers.

As I listen though – I was prompted to think about how big my God is, and how in the midst of life’s storms – He’s got me. Let’s study Job for some references to the weather and how big God is:

• Job 28:25-27: “When He imparted weight to the wind And meted out the waters by measure, When He set a limit for the rain And a course for the thunderbolt, Then He saw it and declared it; He established it and also searched it out.” // How comforting is it that He has a plan and path for each rain drop, and each bolt of lightning, and crash of thunder? How much more than does He care about the direction and path for my life.

#goodtidings

mental health

happyplace

Thinking gets in the way. Did I want to think about being up way past my bedtime this morning as I was sleepily pulling on my running shoes? Yes. Sure did – but, I asked God to shut out those thoughts and I just… did.

Sometimes, we get in our own way of making our biggest triumphs happen. Don’t let that happen to you. You decide what thoughts get to live in that head of yours. This morning, I chose to think about that blissful after-workout soreness that reminds you that you just did something really good for your body and state of mind. I chose to say “Well done. Keep it up.” You can too!

When I want to give up, I go here:

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Thankful So Much

mental health

thankful

Today is Thanksgiving, and a day that I haven’t focused on what I’m actually thankful for, for too long.

I’m thankful for my marriage. And that it’s more work than I ever thought it would be, but way more full of love than I could’ve ever imagined.

I’m thankful for my family, way down in Florida. I’m thankful that my mom is only a phone call away, and how happy she gets from a simple talk.

Eureka!

creativity

tada

Well, I’m sure you’ve seen the changes with my blog! Yep, I took some time today to really dig into how to feature my work, alongside my blog. I knew there was a way!

I found this awesome theme – Blask (free!) – and with it’s fantastic documentation, was able to figure out how to construct my portfolio, with a blog page! It may seem simple to some, but it was a huge breakthrough for me! A few reasons why I decided to change, one more time:

  1. A shorter URL: I went from being about 100 characters… to stuffhollysees.com. Score!
  2. One stop shop: This way, all of my work is in one place, yet still separate. Another win!
  3. Hopefully… more visitors: this way, I give my readers more to browse, and hopefully keep them in my work longer.

If The Past is This Good, I Can’t Wait for the Future

fitness

future

Anyone else struggling with waking up in the mornings to work out?

I was hoping after our wedding, I’d have a little more energy to get my butt up and to the gym! However, that has not been the case. I’ve researched a little on how to beat that desire to stay in that cozy comfy bed. The three things I found most legitimate, and helpful were: